And 7,600 of them discover that aside from micromanaging and degrading the well-being of their employees, they have no other substantive job duties, and their employment is completely pointless.

I became a manager about a year ago. Now that I’m part of the “inner circle”, I can see firsthand what I suspected for the past 20 years.

There are 2 types of managers.

There are cunts bosses who treat their employees as property for their personal gain and advancement. They demand productivity at all costs (see: LLM-cogsuckers), punish for mistakes and pressure people into responsibilities they should take. They are the ones who want RTO to exert control on their employees. They are the ones who “joke” you must take a half-day leave if you need to go before 6PM. They are the ones who openly shit on their employees (or other teams employees FWIW) because they’re not benefiting them enough. They are not part of the team, they feel and act above everyone in it.

The second type, which I strive to be and most of my closest “manager friend” are, are servant-leaders. They want to get shit done by easing roadblocks and making technologically informed decisions. They understand that productivity is a consequence of a functional team and happy employees. They take on responsibility for mistakes and push the team towards finding solutions to prevent them. They understand that Life^TM^ is more important than work. They are an integral part of the team, they’re not the boss but a full member with a different role and different responsibilities, like a PO or a data analyst.

As a tech lead first and a trained Scrum Master second, I feel much more comfortable in the second role. I help the team internally and report and manage external roadblocks with other teams. It’s what I already know. I hate the hierarchical part of the job.

Most of my managers have been the second type, although how effective they are at it has varied a lot. Some are very passive and that has been good and bad, being left alone is great when things are going well. But when you need help they are useless.

The best have been the ones that know a decent amount about the job, they can either help you directly or know exactly where to point you for it. That or they understand the pain and you can both cry together for 4 days with a SQL database and increasingly vague error messages.

I had 2 such 2^nd^ type bosses in over 20 years.
You really notice they’re how you described when they’re gone - the deluge of shit begins almost immediately.

This guy manages and gets it.

Good job. You’re one of the 100 out of that 7,700 managers who actually do something productive and manage properly.

Obviously, that number of 100 is arbitrary to make a wider point. To be fair, it’s probably a significantly higher percentage than I provided in my hypothetical. But holy shit are there waaaaay too many of the type 1 and far too few of the type 2 that you outlined.

Keep at the good stuff, managers with a functional brain are rare. Best of luck keeping sane with all the dumb politicking and other “inner circle” BS.

I fucking hate politics so much…

There’s a guy in my team. I need to push him into a more advanced role. Because he deserves it, and because otherwise I might lose him. I brought him in from another team where things were going bad. Real bad. Turns out, all he needed was a human working with another human, not an type 1 cunt demanding output from a walking, breathing toolset. He already fits and fills that role within the team, but I need to make it official. Better pay, more perspectives. I know I’m gonna get cockblocked by the fuckers who still hate him for the wrong reasons. Career reviews are at the end of the year and I already dread it. I need to get involved in politics and I’m terrified of it.

Politics is a nice word made up to make convincing (or manipulating) others to take up your perspective sound nicer. A silver tongue is a hard earned but quickly lost skill. It sucks but this is now part of your job. Hope you started with or put some points into charisma.

A note, they demand their own SUBJECTIVE PERCEPTION of productivity, not objectively measured productivity itself.

Of course. In this case productivity is a shorthand for obedience. If you do everything I tell you to do, when I tell you to do it and have it done before I need it so I can look good to my managers, then I will deem you productive. Meanwhile, their requirements are completely fucked up and impossible to implement as is, and the deadline is impossible to achieve.

But then who will ask you for a pointless status update during a daily sync up everyday

Performative desk sitting is the worst. Got nothing to do so I have to just click on things.

I’m about to support a satellite launch later this month. Guess what, I have supported the development from my house for the last 5 years. Surprise surprise, butts in seats aren’t necessary.

Has anyone done a study yet to see how many managers’ insecurities about remote work can be handled by placing mannequins in chairs at the office?

Yeah it’s interesting to think about. I’ve been 100% remote for more than SIX YEARS now. Since the first days of COVID. And I’m so deep into it that I’m suffering the ill effects of remote: lack of social interaction with coworkers. Feeling shut up at home all the time. Having to work with people in crazy times zones because remote means you work with whoever, wherever. Zoom fatigue. Lack of separation between work and home life. There are definitely downsides. And some of them are pretty serious. The isolation has really eaten at me, especially.

But would I go back to full time? Heck no.

I’ve been working remotely for over 20 years. One of my subsidiaries is entirely decentralised and remote. I can’t imagine doing anything else now.

I would like to have the option to assemble at an office when we want to, but our company embraced remote so completely that they let a bunch of leases expire and closed whole regional offices. Saved a ton of cash. But it does mean that I never see even my coworkers who are in the same metro area. And that’s a bit of a bummer.

To some extent, work has always been a way to make friends, and that’s also completely off the table now. There just aren’t those spare moments at the water cooler or drinks after work to be the basis of that. I’m older so this is hardly a dealbreaker for me but if I think back to my younger years where I was still building myself and my life, it would be a serious deficiency.

We meet up regularly. The whole team, too. It’s expensive, but priceless.

How often do you do it? What does it look like (Lunch - weeklong visit?)? And who pays for it?

If you don’t mind my asking. I don’t meet many people with 20YOE doing this :)

Copy: »Based on two decades of experience: As a general rule, there should be regular in-person team events (around two a year and just for fun). In addition, there should be joint training sessions (also around two a year). … Cooking together is brilliant: just two days ago we held our summer strategy meeting at a cookery school, where we cooked and enjoyed a three-course meal together. Basically, anything that encourages plenty of interaction and offers a completely different setting to the usual one is ideal.« We (the company) pay everything. It’s a »regular« workday.

Ah so straight up team building days. We dis a lot more of that when we were still in-office, sadly. It fell off during Covid for obvious reasons and after that we were in layoff mode.

Do they pay to fly people out for this twice a year? An activity isn’t necessarily too expensive but the flights & hotel sure can be.

Yes, it’s all-inclusive.

Well that’s definitely the way to go. Glad your employer does it right. It seems to me that the massive amount of money saved in real estate, office staff, and daily meals should easily pay for the kind of thing you are describing, many times over. I wish more employers thought about it that way.

True, similar here. I go to coworking space to eat lunch in the commom area and talk to people.