Dating Apps Are Dying

It’s fascinating how different women’s experiences with these stupid things are than men’s…

How so?

I’m a man who originally met women on these apps, but after a certain point everybody seemed to be a bot and the app seemed to be completely gamified, even when I used paid apps. Other people might have different experiences.

From what I understand, women are deluged with mobs of low-effort fuck boys and men are mostly ignored, which creates a feedback loop where men swipe on anything just for the hope of a match, which only makes things worse.

It’s really fascinating from a systems perspective. But it used to be better before enshittification, in my limited experience. The reality is that quickly finding a new partner you are ideally matched with is the very last thing these companies want you to do.

Women deserve it.

Which one was it, Bumble I think? With the gimmick of requiring women to make the first move? The one that categorically failed because women categorically will not make the first move?

You flooded your bed, now drown in it.

User name checks out.

Constantly. Show me the lie.

I’m not saying you’ re wrong that women don’t like to approach men online. Bumble says 2/3s of women they surveyed said they don’t want to do it (which does leave 1/3, so you can update your extreme statement)…

But to calm your aggravation, maybe you could do a little thought experiment and see if you can’t find some reason other than women suck.

So, for instance, let’s presume the #1 problem women have with online dating is that men are mostly interested in sex. It seems to be a very common complaint, so this is plausible.

SO what happens when a woman makes the first move, is that she is giving some horny guy hope. A guy might say, " well, i don’t think she’s attractive or interesting, but maybe there’s a chance she’ll fuck me on our first date." And that’s not a great position to be in for a woman who is interested in a relationship.

Maybe the reason women don’t make the first move is to lower the odds that they’ll go on a date with a guy who has absolutely ZERO interest in her at all other than as a hole.

And this is not a conversation we’re allowed to have so much any more, because it implies that men are more interested in sex and women are more interested in relationships, and, despite this being the pretty obvious statistical truth driving why online dating is so shitty, this view is considered gender-essentialist.

So make men make the first move, and put him in the position of “Is this chick interested in me at all for anything or does she just want a free dinner?”

Look, the only solution to this is to make dating illegal and prostitution mandatory. Men want sex, women want money. So let’s kick this bullshit power play nonsense in the head, stop pretending love exists, and put the fucking price tag back on.

You might have a selection bias problem. That is, since you are only interested in sex, women probably pick up on that and the people who agree to go on dates with you are the informal sex workers.

I’ve never once installed a dating app on my phone in my entire life, so…nope. I’m on the outside of this one looking in.

So you got all this information from…?

Reading.

How do you determine what you’re reading is accurate?

External consistency. Read something here, something there, they’re congruent, those two sources support each other. Then keep doing that.

Divorce rates are skyrocketing, the number of young people who have never had any kind of relationship is skyrocketing, dating apps are going bankrupt, birth rates are plunging, the children that are being born aren’t being raised, and it’s fundamentally the same reason why there are multiple active genocides going on right now: People are hateful.

External consistency. Read something here, something there, they’re congruent, those two sources support each other. Then keep doing that.

And how are you selecting this literature? And are you discarding anything that doesn’t agree with what you’ve read, or do you keep it aside as a possible alternate theory?

And you are stating a lot of facts, but I don’t know how they establish your argument that all women want is money.

Oh that’s easy. They tell you. Women post all over social media about expecting to be paid for.

Beware the algorithm; it reinforces whatever biases you have.