posted in Asklemmy

Have you ever experienced sexual anhedonia?

I just did. It sucked. For the first time in my life I ejaculated without an orgasm. Not a little one or a lousy one. Like, not one- at all. Nothing.

In fact, I am pretty mad about it right now. It feels like jonesing for a candy bar, putting your cash in the vending machine and it just takes your money. WTF?? Now you’re still hungry, super irritated, and don’t have another dollar.

I pray this is just a one time thing. Please, universe, don’t take away ol trusty.

Has anyone else experienced this??

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Replying to @⁨Ulvain@sh.itjust.works⁩

That sounds terrible. I was prescribed something for an enlarged prostate a few years ago but after it ran out I just quit drinking so much water before bed and it resolved the frequent trips in the night

No, nothing drug related it’s just circumstantial. 11 days straight so far working out of state. Exhausted and missing a few hours of sleep. Cranky and want to be home.

Wanted to knock one out before going to bed as a little stress reliever. Even scrounged through some videos but nothing was really keeping my interest. Then my body was like ‘surprises! alright, you’re done, wrap it up’. And there was no rush or even like that little internal sigh you get. Just a blank space where the orgasm usually goes.

And a really weird, persistent feeling of uncomfortableness inside.

Replying to @⁨MrOtingocni@lemmy.world⁩

Yeah, usually during very early morning sex. Like that your eyes are barely open and you don’t even know how you started having sex or who started it but it’s in full swing by the time you come to. Sometimes during that time, I feel nothing when I cum. It’s not fun but rolling over and going back to bed surely is!

Anyway, if you’re experiencing this on your own, try not spanking the ham for a bit and you’ll get back to normal.

Replying to @⁨digdilem@lemmy.ml⁩

This is how most women experience sex when they talk about lack of orgasm in my experience. I would say all or nearly all of my sexual encounters go exactly like this, I’m a woman and I’ve talked about this with my female friends who often or always experience the same thing. For me though there’s no psych meds involved, it’s just what having an unfulfilling partner (someone who might turn you on physically but neglects your mind) is like.

Replying to @⁨CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world⁩

Yeah, your experience more accurately reflects the term. I should have used the term ‘ejaculatory anhedonia’ or maybe a more generalized ‘orgasmic anhedonia’ but I couldn’t find a consensus on the terms online.

Of course, there’s probably a big difference between a pathological condition of being aroused, performing the sex acts in earnest, but not receiving pleasure from it and just having lousy sex you’re not into with partners who aren’t good at it. Or, like you said, you just can’t get there because the mental aspect is lacking.

Though I did note that, like men, there is evidence of women experiencing orgasms without pleasure, but it’s harder to observe. Sounds like a cop out to me. Sure it’s easy to spot some dude’s dribble, but you could easily measure vaginal contractions with a device.

Replying to @⁨MrOtingocni@lemmy.world⁩

I get that sometimes. It could be related to the antidepressants and other adhd meds I’m on, but I take it as a signal to take a day or two off. Just dial it back a little and then the feelings return.

of course that leaves me with an hour or two of not knowing what to do, but I figure something out. Usually something I forgot to do earlier that day like a craft project I’ve been putting off

Replying to @⁨MrOtingocni@lemmy.world⁩

I’ve never had the ability to feel sexual pleasure, unfortunately. Was a confusing time growing up. It also sometimes makes me really feel like I’m missing out. When all media revolves around sex and you can’t even feel pleasure from masturbation, it feels like you’re missing something from the core human experience. Sometimes it has made me feel like a different species.

I guess at least for me, I “don’t know what I’m missing” because I’ve never experienced it. I’m sorry that you know what it feels like so that it’s more painful when you can’t anymore.

Has anything changed in your life recently?