Replying to @WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
If it was unusually selfish to care about how you were honored after you die, then nobody would be buying grave monuments or fancy urns.
I wouldn’t say unusually, but yes, people are known to be selfish and immature sometimes. Especially when faced with something scary and unavoidable, like death, and backed by culture and tradition.
I imagine it makes them feel like their child doesn’t love them as much as they thought they did.
People receive and express love in different ways. Not understanding and engaging with that is immature. Trying to manipulate another person into doing something uncomfortable after your death for no material reason at all is selfish.
Sometimes we bear little burdens for the people we love, and that’s totally normal, in my opinion.
Maybe the father can bear the little burden of not doing anything and not being materially affected in any way, then.
