fwankie

giant shark with a rash & greasy hair loudly bitching about the water quality around a marina while shot-puting boats ashore because smashing them where they are wouldn't help

my macro characters are too elegant, I need a shark girl who's wearing ship sails ratchet strapped together as a bikini top or something to balance it out

dwarf jortress (it menaces with spikes of denim)

the ancient greeks sure loved stories about a bunch of guys getting on a boat

accidentally slipping into macro furry bullshit and going "oh, you name your pet rocks?" to astronomers

they literally take up 156 parts per million of the solar system by mass, why does anyone give a shit about naming rocks? come on now

imo "planet" isn't really a useful scientific term, you have a number of names that are easy to remember in one category and 9 billion rocks in the other, I think we can deal with calling it 9 billion and something rocks and 4 non-rocks with a star in the middle

8 planets is a perfectly fine argument as long as you admit you're going on notability or ease of observation
9 planets is just being a boomer
7 planets because Mercury is just an inner system dwarf planet is a stance I can respect
18 planets makes sense if you think confirmed dwarf planets count
but 749 planets by cramming all potential dwarf planets into the count is the funniest stance to take