Dyson is glorified shit (mostly)
A friend lent me a Dyson bladeless fan (first bullshit, it’s an enclosed ducted fan, so blades) that is so overcomplicated it’s mind boggling.
400 €
Amazing features:
color screen. On a fan. Why the fuck!!
Remote: I can get onboard with that, but this shit has 6 buttons and 2 rockers. All I need is an on/off/1/2/3 button, a swing, and a cold/hot that is: cold/low/medium/high heat. 3 buttons.
Noisy. My cheapo stand fan from Aldi moves more air and is way more silent.
“Air multiplier technology”… So a Bernoully shroud. Yeah. Revolutionary. Cutting edge.
Swings. Ohhhh, the innovation! Also tilts. Wow!!!
Air filter: O.K. makes sense in a fucking 400€ machine. The again, they go for 25€ at IKEA, and I’m making one, 3D printed, that uses an automotive HEPA cabin filter, 7€, and 4 120 ultra silent 120mm PC fans, 9€/4. And an aliexpress PS/buck converter (undecided)
Dyson replacement filter: 90€. So I can buy an IKEA purifier, and when the filter is clogged, chuck the whole thing, purifier AND filter, 4 times before I replace the Dyson filter.
Etc…
I used to own a Dyson corded vacuum cleaner. The brushes needed replacement. First gripe on a hideously expensive vacuum. Why brushes?? Why!!! I open it up to replace, and the innards were so cheap ass and flimsy it hurt seeing them. screw stubs without reinforcements, plastic clips so flimsy that they broke just by looking at them, self tapping plastic screws (brass threaded inserts cost ME cents.)…
Also, "Look! we are soo cool! Cyclonic particle separation! Like they invented the tech that has been separating sawdust in woodworking shops and sawmills for a century!
And loud. Unnecessarily loud. They make their vacuums loud on purpose, because people associate loud with power.
I now own a 20 yr. old Vorwerk Kobold, made by the same company that makes the Thermomix, an amazing kitchen appliance. Solid, no problems with spares 20 yrs later, silent, HEPA paper bags (bagless are shit, look up vacuum technician opinions on the web) and has great suction (insert sophomoric joke here). SILENT! So silent the dog doesn’t give 2 fucks about it.
That said, Commercial Dyson hand dryers are the only hand dryers I’ll use. Good.
But yeah, they are the Apple of air moving appliances; make people believe they have invented a lot of shit, while they are essentially packagers of that technology, Gouge customers, convince customers that hardware is great (It’s not, and TBH, a lot of Apple’s isn’t either.)
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